hippie_ninja | IC INBOX

[ Cut him some slack, he hadn't tasted it yet. Once he does, Jesus gets an approving nod. ]

Turns out that tracks.

[ It's good! But that observation... hmm. Drake's brow furrows a little, because it's definitely not the case for him. He's always looking. Always watching. Never thought there was anything special about that, really. Everybody he's found who didn't have an eye to help others was either just plain shitty or traumatized in some way. ]

You think that's how most people are?

[He draws a slow breath, thinking.]

I try not to. But things got ugly very fast in my world. I think when people are afraid of losing something, they hoard. And I think it's easier to keep holding onto things than it is to risk giving them to someone who might not give it back. Even harder to give things up knowing you shouldn't expect anything in return.

Help people to not be afraid and people will do incredible things for each other.

[ Drake sips his drink and listens to Jesus' take, nodding quietly. That does make sense even if he can't relate. But how weird does that make him? Everybody around here seems to think he's the strange one, after all. That he's suspicious because he just gives. ]

Huh. I've never gotten all the way to not being afraid... just do shit anyway.

[ Sometimes when he shouldn't. ]

Yeah? [His smile is warm, a little playful] Does that mean you're afraid and came here anyway?

[ Jesus gets a soft huff of laughter for that one. ]

Shit. I didn't even coming here was a risk. You gonna have me jumped out back, Jesus?

Hey, you don't know if I bite. [Hands up, the picture of innocence. He grins and makes himself up a drink, then pays for his and Drake's. He's officially off shift now.]

Come on. We can go sit over there and talk. [Negotiate, is that the term people use here?]

[ Buddy, you could not take him. Just saying. Not that Drake says it either, just picks up his drink and follows Jesus to a table off to the side.

Calling it a negotiation would be another surprise to him, though... he didn't assume Jesus wanted to talk about signing with him, just get advice in general while he made his choice. Maybe use him as a sounding board to go through the options?

That'll be obvious enough once they settle, Drake leaning back in his seat and playing with the stem of his glass. ]

So you gonna tell me about your prospects?

[At this moment he's only looking for advice. He knows the sort of submissive he'll be, the trouble he'll be in, the ways he can be manipulated. He isn't eager to put someone into a position where they can be hurt by his decisions.

So he just shakes his head. What prospects? He has none.]

I don't even know where to start looking for what I need.

[ ...what does that mean? Drake tilts his head in confusion, because 'worried' makes sense now but he doesn't really understand the why yet. ]

Then I guess we've gotta start with figuring out what that is. What you need?

[He hesitates. He looks at Drake, then at his drink.]

I'm not a peaceful citizen. I never have been. And I know that falls back on the Dominant in a relationship.

The last person who rented me out of the Zoo was rough. Being contracted to him would be...hard. But at least he couldn't be used to manipulate me into doing something. So that's where I'm at: let the jail contract me with someone.

[Someone who will beat him. Someone he won't care about.]

[ Drake doesn't look surprised. His expression is actually just... resigned, maybe a little disappointed? But not surprised. Not one bit. ]

I've known subs who went that route. Not letting the jail choose -- you said that guy wasn't a LIEr so it couldn't be him -- but picking somebody they didn't like on purpose. Somebody who treated them like shit, so they wouldn't feel bad about getting in trouble all the time and causing them problems.

It never works out, man. You think it's a fair trade, letting somebody mistreat you so you can fight the system guilt-free? The more you cost them they more they'll want to hurt you, the angrier you get about being stuck with them, the more you rebel, the more they're punished. Those arrangements don't last because they can only ever escalate.

I don't wanna watch that happen to you, Jesus. Please don't.

I'm open to better ideas. [He can be stubborn but he's not hotheaded and he's usually open-minded.] I just don't have better options right now. And I only have two weeks to figure this out.

There's plenty of people around who don't care what shit you get into... hell, some might even encourage it now and then if they've got cash to burn or you let them keep your paychecks. Ideally, though? Don't go for someone who doesn't care, or who'll enable the chaos. Find someone like minded, who you can communicate with, but who you can trust to have your back. Somebody who'll keep you from getting arrested just because you're restless, but will support you when you're breaking rules for good reasons.

[ It's a tall order, Drake realizes that, but he can think of a couple examples off the top of his head. Himself included, obviously. ]

What about this Vrenille?

[He shakes his head] He's full on contracts.

[What Drake describes is an ideal. It would be perfect. But he knows he's not going to find that in two weeks when he hasn't found anything remotely like it in three months.

But he doesn't want to step back into an abusive relationship. He had his fill of them, he's a stronger and better person for not being in one now. But like he said: he has no real options.]

...I've got a few names, if you think you could build enough trust with anybody in two weeks, but no guarantees. Unless you wanted to sign with me.

[ There might not be enough between them yet, either, and Drake's intentionally kept his nose out of Jesus' rebellion because it didn't seem like the other man wanted him involved. If they contracted, that would have to change.

Again, though? The last thing he wants to come off as is pushy. Rosita seemed uncomfortable with his willingness to take Jesus on and that was as much of a warning as anything else. And obviously she's an option -- Jesus knows that, right? Or had she not offered directly even though she'd told him as much?

Drake shrugs one shoulder, approaching that idea at an angle instead of head on. ]

Rosita might have something to say about this, too, you know.

Rosita doesn't want me in prison. She...she wasn't happy about me being in the Zoo that week. [An understatement. Which is one reason he's reluctant to contract with her; they are both so unexpectedly protective of each other. It makes for poor judgment calls.

But he's also already so attached to her, and all of this hammers hard on his reluctance to put too much faith in any one person.]

...Are you serious? About- you?

Yeah. I thought I made that clear last month? It's been on the table, I'm just not...

[ He looks awkward for a moment, an uncharacteristic expression that he shakes off by taking a sip of his drink. This is the one area he never has the nerve for. Selling himself, offering contracts, asking for quota help, none of that's easy for him. There's always that fear he's going to come off pushy or creepy or threatening or whatever other way that makes someone uncomfortable, which is his worst case scenario.

People can think he's weird or suspicious for being nice all they want and he'll do his best to patiently prove them otherwise, but he doesn't ever want somebody to be scared of him. ]

I thought you weren't interested.

I am.

[He's laid out the sort of unholy terror he plans to be, has already started being.] I didn't think you'd be interested if you knew the trouble I get into.

If you're getting into it for the right reasons, I'm interested. I like you. From what you've been willing to tell me I think we're pretty much on the same page for what needs to improve around here, if not how to do that. I'd have your back so long as you're not just poking the metaphorical bear out of boredom, and honestly I'm pretty sure I'm already used to way worse chaos than you could ever manage.

[ You haven't met Felix, Jesus. You probably shouldn't meet Felix, if you think you're planning to be an unholy terror. Felix at his best is an unhinged nightmare twink who's literally tried to kill the vast majority of people around him. Just because.

But that's not the point right now. Drake takes a breath, lets it out slow, and meets Jesus' eyes. ]

If it hurts Ephemera somehow, the conversation might change. That's my line. Everything else, I think we'd figure out.

[Jesus has waged wars and orchestrated coups, but always with a specific purpose in it. He's always focused on doing the least amount of harm possible.

That doesn't mean he hasn't, or won't, hurt other people to meet his goals. He has no regrets about some truly awful things he's been part of. But it does mean he tries every other way first.]

Who's Ephemera?

My partner. We just went permanent, actually.

[ And just like every other time Drake's mentioned him to Jesus, he can't completely keep the fondness from his expression or the warmth out of his voice. It's soft, but there. ]

You know, he might be on board to rock the boat with you at some point. It depends... but I'm pretty sure he'll like you too.

Would he be okay with you contracting with me? [So soon, they've barely had time to get settled into their own contract...]

Yeah, I've had other subs before. If anything I think he'll be more comfortable with it now... we'd renewed every time it was up for a year before this. And I did mention you already, so you've just gotta introduce yourself.

[ He's quiet for a moment, wondering if he should give a warning or not. For some reason he isn't worried about Jesus' reaction at all, but that just makes him feel like it's safe to give a heads up? ]

Two weeks isn't a lot of time, but I don't want you to rush a decision because you're worried about it running out. Sleep on it, hit him up to meet, see how it goes. Just don't let his appearance throw you.

[He tips his head, curious. He's seen... a lot of things. Nothing he's seen here has come close to phasing him.]

All right?

It's just scarring, but he's really self conscious. And nervous with new people, so.

[ Drake smiles at Jesus, and this time the fondness is for him. ]

Something tells me you're good with putting people at ease.

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