[ Clearly V's not spent a great deal of his life writing with pen and paper if his handwriting is anything to go by, but it feels a whole lot more personal than dropping the guy a message via the network.
So there's a scrawled out note left on Jesus' bed after V's left for the Up with Nibbles: ]
image description:
J Should have told you I was moving out just didn’t know how to. Fucking sucks. Hate that I even have to say this but come see Nibbles whenever. Apparently I can give you an endorsement or something for the Up. Didn’t choose this but feels like garbage anyway. I’m sorry V
[ There's no getting away from the fact that V has simultaneously wanted to hear from Jesus and also... not. If he doesn't hear he could just assume the man hasn't read the note yet, so it's not real yet in that relationship.
But then he gets a video message and what sucks the most is Nibbles starting to purr from his new fancy bed, and V can only assume it's because he's heard Jesus' voice.
He looks more on the defeated side when he forces himself to reply, face only half in the frame. ]
'ey. Gonna guess ya found the note. And if not prob'ly time to tell ya anyway that they forced me to move.
[ And there lies the problem for V: he doesn't want to have perks that aren't available for his people too. And Jesus is very firmly one of his people.
He tries harder to rein in how he feels if only to not put a total tailspin on the conversation. ]
It's not right.
Shouldn't be able to do shit you can't 'cause of this fucked up privilege.
[ The idea of talking in person is something he so desperately wants. He wants to catch up with Jesus and, most likely, have that easy and casual physical reassurance. A hug, anything that V can take and hold on to while he rights himself again.
But he's terrified of what might happen if they do.
He's seen what some Dominants have been forced to do to Submissives. What's expected... ]
Dunno if that's a nova idea, choom.
What if--
[ He can barely entertain these ideas without wanting to turn himself inside out in deep discomfort. ]
[ It's important to share that at least. Of course he wants to see Jesus. He's just letting his concern eat away at him. ]
Prob'ly not gonna let me back into the dorm room.
So - somewhere we ain't gonna get fucked over by SIN guards?
Somewhere in the Down.
[ He thinks to add belatedly if only because Submissives seem to have just as bad a time in the Up, and the expectation is even loftier for them to behave how they're supposed to. At least in the Down they can find some dark corner. ]
[ When V arrives it isn't with his usual brand of broad smile and open arms. For somebody who's fairly used to people trying to take chunks out of him, his preference tends to lean towards leading with a hug, a fond touch. Anything physical.
When he spots Jesus across the cafe - the quiet corner a mercy at this point - he picks his way through trying his best not to notice anybody else's reaction to him. As far as they know, he's an unknown Dominant who's strolled in and should be treated with caution. ]
Fuck, 's good to see ya.
[ It's murmured as he slides himself into a chair next to his former roommate, fingers practically aching to reach out and just take reassurance from Jesus' solid existence. ]
[He's glad they picked this place. He's also noticing already that being here with a Dominant means people are already looking away from them, giving them space.
He sits and he rests his hand on V's shoulder. It's good to see him, too.]
This doesn't change who you are. You're still my friend, all right?
[ If there were ever words to balm how he feels inside - words that he really needed to hear - it's these. The other man cuts through all thoughts of the subtle reactions around them, and V's so grateful he has to look down at the tabletop briefly to pull himself back together. ]
's what I'm tryin' to tell myself, but it sounds better comin' from you.
[ At least somebody else's belief is enough temporarily to quieten his thoughts to the contrary. ]
Sorry I didn't tell ya face to face. Freaked a bit. K showed up halfway through the meltdown while I was tryin' to pack my shit.
[ All of one duffel bag. His possessions are few and far in between. ]
[ Which is a testament to K's success in talking V back from a rough place to a slightly less rough place. Even that fraction of warmth made a difference. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
note
So there's a scrawled out note left on Jesus' bed after V's left for the Up with Nibbles: ]
image description:
J
Should have told you I was moving out just didn’t know how to. Fucking sucks.
Hate that I even have to say this but come see Nibbles whenever. Apparently I can give you an endorsement or something for the Up.
Didn’t choose this but feels like garbage anyway.
I’m sorry
V
Video
Are you okay?
video →
But then he gets a video message and what sucks the most is Nibbles starting to purr from his new fancy bed, and V can only assume it's because he's heard Jesus' voice.
He looks more on the defeated side when he forces himself to reply, face only half in the frame. ]
'ey. Gonna guess ya found the note. And if not prob'ly time to tell ya anyway that they forced me to move.
Re: video →
[And he's not angry. He misses V, though.
And Nibbles.]
What happened?
no subject
Dunno. Just woke up and I'm... not the same. City switched my designation 'cept they're sayin' I've always been this way.
[ He can't even bring himself to say the words, to give them a shape he doesn't like. ]
Said I can't stay livin' with ya there.
...hate it here.
no subject
This doesn't have to be a bad thing. We said we'd explore and learn this place, right? There are things you can do now that I can't.
no subject
He tries harder to rein in how he feels if only to not put a total tailspin on the conversation. ]
It's not right.
Shouldn't be able to do shit you can't 'cause of this fucked up privilege.
no subject
Do you want to talk in person?
no subject
But he's terrified of what might happen if they do.
He's seen what some Dominants have been forced to do to Submissives. What's expected... ]
Dunno if that's a nova idea, choom.
What if--
[ He can barely entertain these ideas without wanting to turn himself inside out in deep discomfort. ]
no subject
It's okay. I want to see you.
no subject
[ It's important to share that at least. Of course he wants to see Jesus. He's just letting his concern eat away at him. ]
Prob'ly not gonna let me back into the dorm room.
So - somewhere we ain't gonna get fucked over by SIN guards?
Somewhere in the Down.
[ He thinks to add belatedly if only because Submissives seem to have just as bad a time in the Up, and the expectation is even loftier for them to behave how they're supposed to. At least in the Down they can find some dark corner. ]
no subject
action →
When he spots Jesus across the cafe - the quiet corner a mercy at this point - he picks his way through trying his best not to notice anybody else's reaction to him. As far as they know, he's an unknown Dominant who's strolled in and should be treated with caution. ]
Fuck, 's good to see ya.
[ It's murmured as he slides himself into a chair next to his former roommate, fingers practically aching to reach out and just take reassurance from Jesus' solid existence. ]
no subject
He sits and he rests his hand on V's shoulder. It's good to see him, too.]
This doesn't change who you are. You're still my friend, all right?
no subject
's what I'm tryin' to tell myself, but it sounds better comin' from you.
[ At least somebody else's belief is enough temporarily to quieten his thoughts to the contrary. ]
Sorry I didn't tell ya face to face. Freaked a bit. K showed up halfway through the meltdown while I was tryin' to pack my shit.
[ All of one duffel bag. His possessions are few and far in between. ]
no subject
Did he help?
no subject
[ Which is a testament to K's success in talking V back from a rough place to a slightly less rough place. Even that fraction of warmth made a difference. ]
I like 'im.