hippie_ninja: (Default)
Paul Rovia ([personal profile] hippie_ninja) wrote2022-06-27 04:36 pm
Entry tags:

IC INBOX



This is Jesus. Leave a message.
konstant: (Than Humans)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-11 05:23 am (UTC)(link)
"I know."

That smile again, a small, swift quirk of one side of his mouth. He hadn't been able to tell what the similarities were and what was specific to him though, not until now.

"That's what was different: I knew that even if any of those things happened, it wouldn't change me. That my value was inherent. That I had the ability to... defend my own worth. I wasn't a person because you treated me like one, although I liked that. I just was."
konstant: (Thoughtful)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-11 05:29 am (UTC)(link)
"I'm still learning," he offers, because that doubt - that fear - came right back when it was all over. That's what he learned, too: it's not reliant on people like Jesus treating him well. It's a shift somewhere in himself.

"I can't just stop being afraid of something like that. Especially when it has been true - it has happened."
konstant: (Praying)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-12 01:03 am (UTC)(link)
It's not the sort of thing that people can just tell him not to worry about anymore; K knows that from his own experience. People keep trying to tell him it's alright, he's safe now, but it doesn't take. He doesn't relax, or doesn't think about it the next time.

"When did it start?" he asks instead. "Do you remember?"
konstant: (Behind)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-12 01:08 am (UTC)(link)
"Was there ever anyone you trusted? Anyone you knew wouldn't do that to you?"

K's too, but he doesn't try to compare them. He was never a child, never three years old, never had parents - even though he remembers all of that on a truncated timeline, too.
konstant: (Gaze)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-12 01:13 am (UTC)(link)
K smiles back, a bittersweet expression of his own along the same vein.

"For me, either," he does offer then. They're both starting from scratch. They're both batting a thousand.
konstant: (Thoughtful)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-12 01:19 am (UTC)(link)
"We are," he agrees, emphasis ever so slightly on the we.

He reaches, too, to set his fingers along the back of Jesus's hand on his face.

"Are you okay with everything that happened during the festival?" Which is a slightly different question than are you okay.
konstant: (Vegas 1)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-12 01:24 am (UTC)(link)
"I love that you loved it."

Which is perhaps not a great answer. He turns it a slightly different way: "The fear is back. I could've been retired for being a replicant taking advantage of a human from a position of authority. I don't know how to get back to that place, but I like thinking about what happened."
konstant: (Vegas 9)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-12 01:30 am (UTC)(link)
"Sweeting," K murmurs, turning his head, kissing his palm. "You're human."

Which doesn't mean anything to people from worlds where humans are the only creatures that have laws, that obey social structures in cities and systems.

"Any replicant caught out of line with any human has retirement to fear, if things go wrong, or just change."
konstant: (Down)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-12 01:36 am (UTC)(link)
"I trust that if you change your mind, you won't take it out on me," he agrees.

"I trust that if you want me here, you'll tell me, and if you don't, you'll tell me. I trust you."

Enough to follow him into a contracting process that he doesn't trust at all.
konstant: (Content)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-15 03:20 am (UTC)(link)
It could be overwhelming if K let it, honestly. What he can read like Jesus is shouting at him in the moments before he's kissing him again, the intensity pressing through the lines of him as they lean together, and the staggering relief of realizing that Jesus understands exactly what K is saying - the magnitude if not the details - are all almost just a bit too much.

But he stands under it regardless, hands resting lightly at the other man's hips, and he sinks into that kiss too, taking his time to take some comfort in being seen.

"Thank you," he murmurs, staying close.
konstant: (Bloodied)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-15 05:29 am (UTC)(link)
"No." He'd stay anyway, because it's the kind of thing he's already lost patience for as far as he's concerned, but this answer happens to be true:

"I stayed with Sara all month. Just the one other night with you."
konstant: (Content)

[personal profile] konstant 2022-12-15 05:39 am (UTC)(link)
"Sex isn't even close to the reason I'd want to stay," he chuckles, smoothing hair back from Jesus's face - even if his smile quirks playful, too: "Although you're doing an excellent job of converting me."

He tips his head towards the couch anyway. "What can I do to help?"

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